Wednesday, May 24, 2006
4:12 AM
ã ã
Whenever I look into the mirror, I can only see a lonely girl with a gigantic frown on her face.
She can never be happy again. She feel so upset and alone with no real friends around her.
She do not know what to do in her life. At times, she felt like giving up. She just pretending nothing happened and put on the fake smile on her face in school. What can she do other then that? She dont want to create trouble in school.
She feel there's alot of things in her mind. Something she wants to let out to someone who can really help her find her true self back. She felt trouble. She wants to talk to a friend of hers but she tried and tried to call her. Unfortunately, that friend of hers didnt pick up. She has alot of things to talk to her. She wanted to say sorry for not being a good friend, selfish and keep pissing her off. She realize that she's being such a jerk for the past few days. And the truth is, she hate it whenever this has to happen. She's sorry, she really is.
Although there's friends asking what happened, she do appreciate them asking but there's nothing they can do other then comforting her.
It makes no difference.
She didnt want it to be this way. In her teenage life, she suffered unhappiness and pain. She's tired of all things but somehow it keep coming back to her. Happy days doesnt last long. I know.
Friends, she's just confused. Why cant a friend just understand her feelings and just be a true friend? She want to go away somewhere far. Far from all those who made her life unhappy. She doesnt want to live in here. She want to start a new life. Make new friends. And breathe in a new atmosphere. If only..
She doesnt want to live here. She doesnt want to face those friends who cant seem to stop creating trouble in my life. She doesnt want to face all those pressure. She's running away from reality.
She felt unwelcome and unappreciated in her class/ around her friends. She felt like no one friend with her truthfully. She's hurt always mostly by her friends. Friends is always her common problem other then herself and studies.
She never know whats the meaning of life. And the reasons of why she's living in this world. She want to talk to her friends.
~~~~~
I thought after MYE, I can relax but nope, I was wrong. Infact, there's so much more things to think of and do. During the June holidays, I have not much time to enjoy. I have councillor, camps, ODAC and CCA not to forget remedials. The rest of the time is either spent on family, friends and studies. Tomorrow there's councillor training. Friday, get report book and Sec 2 Adventure camp. Will be back on Monday.
Life hasnt been OK for me for the past few days. Fath, PLEASE ANSWER MY CALL, AITE?
TATA~~