Sunday, February 12, 2006
3:01 AM
ã ã
I seriously hate it when this have to happen.
I don't want to be sad anymore. I tried not to be sad.
At times, I myself don't know the reason of me feeling down.
I just couldn't help it.
I don't want to cry. I don't want to make my life miserable over little matters.
I'm sick and tired of being sad.
I tried telling others about how I feel.
But then,
I realize...
No one really understands how I really felt.
No one can actually help me.
I appreciate to those who tried helping me.
I just don't know how to express my feelings anymore.
It's all mixed up.
Am I sad? Like REAL sad.
or
Am I just being emotionally and take things hardly?
I don't know.
I don't know why am I sad all this while.
I smiled.
But no one knows whether I'm really smiling or I'm smiling for the sake of smiling.
I love my family. But at times, I just feel that they too don't understand how I feel.
I just want someone. Regardless of any race, age, or what so ever.
To really understand me and look thru my past. And feel what Is it like to be ME.
the pain i went thru, the sacrifices and all.
but WHO? or WHEN? or HOW?
I admit that I ever felt happy.
But it all ends when i reached primary 5.
Eversince primary 5, I started to feel like this.
Sometimes Happy,
Smetimes Sad.
I thought I've already forget him.
For the past few days, YES.
but now...
I'm not too sure.
I just don't know.
I told people to think positively about life.
But I myself?
Who is there to tell me like that?
No one.
What should I do?
Somebody please tell me.
Tell me...
Tell me...
Like what I wrote above.
I hate it when I'm feeling sad.
Now, I'm down. I just need time to smile again.
And I know I will smile and be my old self again. Haha =)
Lastly,
I just hope everything will be fine soon for me..
And I hope Aaliyah will soon find how beautiful life is.
I hope everyone will treasure life.
Its not something when you can throw it and take it back.
Criies............